A sailor goes out and buys a really fast MacGregor blue hull boat. He takes it out to try the motor and, while doing so, stops to talk to a sailor in a Macgregor white hull boat.
The white hull sailor looks over the sleek, shiny surface of the blue hull and asks "What kind of boat ya got there, sonny?".
The dude replies "A 2005 Blue Hull MacGregor and it goes really fast"
The white hull sailor asks "Can I take a look inside?"
"Sure" replies the owner.
So the white hull sailor pokes his head over the safety lines and looks around. He says "That's a pretty nice boat, alright!"
Just then the blue hull sailors see a gal he's been looking for. So the guy decides to show the white hull sailor what he can do. He opens her up full throttle. The guy notices a dot from behind. It seems to be getting closer!
Whhhoooooooooossssshhhhhh! Something whips by him! Going maybe three times as fast!
The guy wonders "what on earth could be going faster than my blue hull boat?" Then, ahead of him, he sees a dot coming toward him.
Whooooooooooosh! Goes by again! And, it almost looked like the white hull sailor! Couldn't be thinks the guy. How could a white hull sailor outrun a blue hull sailor? Again, he sees a dot behind him!
WhoooooooshhhhhhhhKa-BbbbblaMMMMM! It plows into the back of his sailboat, demolishing the rear end.
The guy jumps up and discovers it is the white hull sailor! He asks "Is there anything I can do for you?"
The white hull sailor replies "Yeah. Unhook my suspenders from your safety lines!"
Blue Hull Jokes
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Mark Prouty
- Admiral
- Posts: 1723
- Joined: Mon Jan 19, 2004 8:52 am
- Location: Madison, WI Former MacGregor 26X Owner
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RandyMoon
- Captain
- Posts: 779
- Joined: Mon Sep 13, 2004 7:05 pm
- Sailboat: MacGregor 26M
- Location: Rockwall, TX Lake Ray Hubbard 2005M #0690 L405 Tohatsu TLDI 90 (Rhapsody in Blue)
A farmer and his wife went to a marina. The farmer, who had never been on a sailboat, was fascinated by a blue hull Mac and asked the Captain how much a ride in the sailboat would cost.
"$20 for 3 minutes." the Captain replied.
"That's too much." said the farmer.
The Captain thought for a second and then said, "I'll make you a deal. If you and your wife sail for 3 minutes without uttering a sound, the ride will be free. But if you make any sound at all, you'll have to pay me the $20."
The farmer and his wife agreed and went for a thrilling ride. After they landed back in the marina, the Captian said to the farmer, "I want to congratulate you for not making a sound. You are a brave man." "Maybe so," said the farmer, "but I gotta tell ya, I almost screamed when my wife fell overboard when the blue hull sailboat smoked the white hull Mac."
"$20 for 3 minutes." the Captain replied.
"That's too much." said the farmer.
The Captain thought for a second and then said, "I'll make you a deal. If you and your wife sail for 3 minutes without uttering a sound, the ride will be free. But if you make any sound at all, you'll have to pay me the $20."
The farmer and his wife agreed and went for a thrilling ride. After they landed back in the marina, the Captian said to the farmer, "I want to congratulate you for not making a sound. You are a brave man." "Maybe so," said the farmer, "but I gotta tell ya, I almost screamed when my wife fell overboard when the blue hull sailboat smoked the white hull Mac."
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RandyMoon
- Captain
- Posts: 779
- Joined: Mon Sep 13, 2004 7:05 pm
- Sailboat: MacGregor 26M
- Location: Rockwall, TX Lake Ray Hubbard 2005M #0690 L405 Tohatsu TLDI 90 (Rhapsody in Blue)
Jack decided to go sailing with his buddy, Bob. Jack had a blue hull Mac and Bob had a while hull. After sailing and driving back to town with their trailerable sailboats for a few hours, they got caught in a terrible blizzard.
They pulled into a nearby farm and asked the attractive lady who answered the door if they could spend the night.
"I realize it's terrible weather out there and I have this huge house all to myself, but I'm recently "widowed," she explained. "I'm afraid the neighbors will talk if I let you stay in my house."
"Don't worry," Jack said. "We'll be happy to store our Mac sailboats and sleep in the barn. And if the weather breaks, we'll be gone at first light."
The lady agreed, and the two men found their way to the barn and settled in for the night. Come morning, the weather had cleared, and they got on their way.
About nine months later, Jack got an unexpected letter from an attorney.
It took him a few minutes to figure it out, but he finally determined that it was from the attorney of that attractive widow he had met on the sailing weekend.
He dropped in on his friend Bob and asked, "Bob, do you remember that good-looking widow from the farm we stayed at on our sailing holiday up North?"
"Yes, I do."
"Did you happen to get up in the middle of the night, go up to the house and pay her a visit?"
"Yes," Bob said, a little embarrassed about being found out. "I have to admit that I did."
"And did you happen to use my name instead of telling her your name?"
Bob's face turned red and he said, "Yeah, sorry, buddy. I'm afraid I did."
"Why do you ask?"
"She just died and left me everything. Now I am going to buy a Hunter 360 and move to San Juan Islands in Puget Sound"
They pulled into a nearby farm and asked the attractive lady who answered the door if they could spend the night.
"I realize it's terrible weather out there and I have this huge house all to myself, but I'm recently "widowed," she explained. "I'm afraid the neighbors will talk if I let you stay in my house."
"Don't worry," Jack said. "We'll be happy to store our Mac sailboats and sleep in the barn. And if the weather breaks, we'll be gone at first light."
The lady agreed, and the two men found their way to the barn and settled in for the night. Come morning, the weather had cleared, and they got on their way.
About nine months later, Jack got an unexpected letter from an attorney.
It took him a few minutes to figure it out, but he finally determined that it was from the attorney of that attractive widow he had met on the sailing weekend.
He dropped in on his friend Bob and asked, "Bob, do you remember that good-looking widow from the farm we stayed at on our sailing holiday up North?"
"Yes, I do."
"Did you happen to get up in the middle of the night, go up to the house and pay her a visit?"
"Yes," Bob said, a little embarrassed about being found out. "I have to admit that I did."
"And did you happen to use my name instead of telling her your name?"
Bob's face turned red and he said, "Yeah, sorry, buddy. I'm afraid I did."
"Why do you ask?"
"She just died and left me everything. Now I am going to buy a Hunter 360 and move to San Juan Islands in Puget Sound"
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Catigale
- Site Admin
- Posts: 10421
- Joined: Fri Jun 11, 2004 5:59 pm
- Sailboat: MacGregor 26X
- Location: Admiral .............Catigale 2002X.......Lots of Harpoon Hobie 16 Skiffs....Island 17
- Contact:
Two Mac sailors, one with a blue hull, and one with a white hull are comparing the cost of running their boats.
Blue Mac says, "This blue hull is fast, but its killing me finanically" I had to send the Admiral out for a night of prostitution on our last cruise. She did pretty well though. Made a $100 and a quarter.
White Mac "WHo paid the quarter?"
Blue Mac "All of them!"
Ta-dum!
Blue Mac says, "This blue hull is fast, but its killing me finanically" I had to send the Admiral out for a night of prostitution on our last cruise. She did pretty well though. Made a $100 and a quarter.
White Mac "WHo paid the quarter?"
Blue Mac "All of them!"
Ta-dum!
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kmclemore
- Site Admin
- Posts: 6256
- Joined: Sun Feb 08, 2004 9:24 am
- Sailboat: MacGregor 26X
- Location: Ambler, PA -- MACX2018A898 w/ Suzuki DF60AV -- 78 BW Harpoon 4.6 -- 2018 Tahoe 550TF w/ 150 Merc
Ick.Catigale wrote:Two Mac sailors, one with a blue hull, and one with a white hull are comparing the cost of running their boats.
Blue Mac says, "This blue hull is fast, but its killing me finanically" I had to send the Admiral out for a night of prostitution on our last cruise. She did pretty well though. Made a $100 and a quarter.
White Mac "Who paid the quarter?"
Blue Mac "All of them!"
Ta-dum!
Just goes to show you, White Hull Gals are worth way more than Blue Hull Gals.
(ha... that comment ought to pull a few blue-zelots out of the closet...)
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Mark Prouty
- Admiral
- Posts: 1723
- Joined: Mon Jan 19, 2004 8:52 am
- Location: Madison, WI Former MacGregor 26X Owner
We'd better be careful here. I heard the same story but it was a white hull admiral and the total was $100 and a 15 cents.kmclemore wrote:Ick.Catigale wrote:Two Mac sailors, one with a blue hull, and one with a white hull are comparing the cost of running their boats.
Blue Mac says, "This blue hull is fast, but its killing me finanically" I had to send the Admiral out for a night of prostitution on our last cruise. She did pretty well though. Made a $100 and a quarter.
White Mac "Who paid the quarter?"
Blue Mac "All of them!"
Ta-dum!
Just goes to show you, White Hull Gals are worth way more than Blue Hull Gals.
(ha... that comment ought to pull a few blue-zelots out of the closet...)
Last edited by Mark Prouty on Fri Apr 22, 2005 7:41 am, edited 1 time in total.
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ALX357
- Admiral
- Posts: 1231
- Joined: Thu Jul 22, 2004 6:09 am
- Location: Nashville TN -- 2000 MacGregor 26X, Mercury two-stroke 50hp
Three brothers decide to go in together on a sailboat 
- the MacDealer salesmum delivers them a white-hull boat for $21,000 CASH ! I think they threw in a 5 horse Nishatsuzondama three-stroke. 
Anyway as they were towing off in the Torus, the finance guy comes running out to tell them they were accidently over-charged for a blue hull and are due a 500-dollar refund.
(O.K. not damn likely, but bear with me,- it's a story) 
So he hands back to the men the refund in one-hundred bills, 5 of them. (5/3
) After some head-scratching, the 3 brothers each take one of the bills, and 
decide to splurge on some blue latex exterior paint. ( just gotta hava blue-hull)
NOW, each man originally paid 7,000 dollars, but got 100 back, so they actually only paid $6, 900 each. Three (brothers) times $6900 equals $20,700, and the guy at Sherwin Williams has $200, making for $20,900. Hey ! WHAT HAPPENED to the other 100 dollars voodo financing ? (i told you my math skills were crummy) 
- the MacDealer salesmum delivers them a white-hull boat for $21,000 CASH ! I think they threw in a 5 horse Nishatsuzondama three-stroke. Anyway as they were towing off in the Torus, the finance guy comes running out to tell them they were accidently over-charged for a blue hull and are due a 500-dollar refund.
(O.K. not damn likely, but bear with me,- it's a story) So he hands back to the men the refund in one-hundred bills, 5 of them. (5/3
) After some head-scratching, the 3 brothers each take one of the bills, and decide to splurge on some blue latex exterior paint. ( just gotta hava blue-hull)NOW, each man originally paid 7,000 dollars, but got 100 back, so they actually only paid $6, 900 each. Three (brothers) times $6900 equals $20,700, and the guy at Sherwin Williams has $200, making for $20,900. Hey ! WHAT HAPPENED to the other 100 dollars
voodo financing ? (i told you my math skills were crummy) -
Scott
- Admiral
- Posts: 1654
- Joined: Tue May 18, 2004 12:46 pm
- Sailboat: Venture 25
- Location: 1978 Catalina 22 with all the Racing Goodies!! 4 horse fire breathing monster on the transom
Warning some of the content in this post may not be suitable for Blue Hull Sailors, Sailor discretion is advised.
A Blue hull and a White hull were rafted up in a cove. They got up in the morning and were standing on the transoms peeing when the blue hull captain says; "water sure is cold this morning", the white hull captain says; "yeah, and its about 3' deep"
Budummmph bump ccchhhhh!!! (Drum roll)
Blue hulls are faster. The blue hull captain finished first. About 0.01 kt
A Blue hull and a White hull were rafted up in a cove. They got up in the morning and were standing on the transoms peeing when the blue hull captain says; "water sure is cold this morning", the white hull captain says; "yeah, and its about 3' deep"
Budummmph bump ccchhhhh!!! (Drum roll)
Blue hulls are faster. The blue hull captain finished first. About 0.01 kt
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RandyMoon
- Captain
- Posts: 779
- Joined: Mon Sep 13, 2004 7:05 pm
- Sailboat: MacGregor 26M
- Location: Rockwall, TX Lake Ray Hubbard 2005M #0690 L405 Tohatsu TLDI 90 (Rhapsody in Blue)
Once upon a time there was a famous sea captain. This captain was very successful at what he did; for years he guided merchant ships all over the world. Never did stormy seas or pirates get the best of him. He was admired by his crew and fellow captains.
However, there was one thing different about this captain. Every morning he went through a strange ritual. He would lock himself in his captain's quarters and open a small safe. In the safe was an envelope with a piece of paper inside. He would stare at the paper for a minute, then lock it back up. Afterwards, he would go about his daily duties. For years this went on, and his crew became very curious.
Was it a treasure map? Was it a letter from a long lost love? Everyone speculated about the contents of the strange envelope.
One day the captain died at sea. After laying the captain's body to rest, the first mate led the entire crew into the captains quarters.
He opened the safe, got the envelope, opened it and...
The first mate turned pale and showed the paper to the others. Seven words were on the paper; three lines and they said:
Port Left
Starboard Right
Blue Hull Faster
However, there was one thing different about this captain. Every morning he went through a strange ritual. He would lock himself in his captain's quarters and open a small safe. In the safe was an envelope with a piece of paper inside. He would stare at the paper for a minute, then lock it back up. Afterwards, he would go about his daily duties. For years this went on, and his crew became very curious.
Was it a treasure map? Was it a letter from a long lost love? Everyone speculated about the contents of the strange envelope.
One day the captain died at sea. After laying the captain's body to rest, the first mate led the entire crew into the captains quarters.
He opened the safe, got the envelope, opened it and...
The first mate turned pale and showed the paper to the others. Seven words were on the paper; three lines and they said:
Port Left
Starboard Right
Blue Hull Faster
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RandyMoon
- Captain
- Posts: 779
- Joined: Mon Sep 13, 2004 7:05 pm
- Sailboat: MacGregor 26M
- Location: Rockwall, TX Lake Ray Hubbard 2005M #0690 L405 Tohatsu TLDI 90 (Rhapsody in Blue)
A young wife, her husband who owned a white hull Mac and a young good-looking sailor with a blue hull Mac were shipwrecked on an island after the two Macs collided.
One morning, the blue hull sailor climbed a tall coconut tree and yelled, "Stop making love down there!"
"What's the matter with you?" the white hull husband said when the sailor climbed down. '"We weren't making love."
"Sorry," said the blue hull sailor, "From up there it looked like you were."
Every morning thereafter, the blue hull sailor scaled the same tree and yelled the same thing. Finally the husband decided to climb the tree and see for himself.
With great difficulty (slow), he made his way to the top.
The husband says to himself, "By golly he's right! It DOES look like they're making love down there!"
Moral of the story: Blue hull owners are quicker than white hull owners.
One morning, the blue hull sailor climbed a tall coconut tree and yelled, "Stop making love down there!"
"What's the matter with you?" the white hull husband said when the sailor climbed down. '"We weren't making love."
"Sorry," said the blue hull sailor, "From up there it looked like you were."
Every morning thereafter, the blue hull sailor scaled the same tree and yelled the same thing. Finally the husband decided to climb the tree and see for himself.
With great difficulty (slow), he made his way to the top.
The husband says to himself, "By golly he's right! It DOES look like they're making love down there!"
Moral of the story: Blue hull owners are quicker than white hull owners.
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Scott
- Admiral
- Posts: 1654
- Joined: Tue May 18, 2004 12:46 pm
- Sailboat: Venture 25
- Location: 1978 Catalina 22 with all the Racing Goodies!! 4 horse fire breathing monster on the transom
Blue hull boy gets captured by pirates. They draw a circle on the deck and tell him if he steps out of it they will keel haul him.
The pirates begin having their way with his missus and he begins to chuckle, they wheel around and remind him not to step out of the circle.
They begin off loading his belongings and he chortles thru a clenched hand, they again remind him not to exit the circle.
While they are tying up his kids to sell into slavery, he begins laughing uncontrolably.
The Pirate captain, "Old white hull" steps over and lears at blue hull saying, "TELL ME WHY YE"S A-LAUGHIN" OR I'S'LL GUT YE RIGHT NOW BOY!!!!"
Blue hull boy ponders this and says: "while you werent looking I stepped out of the circle Three times!!
The pirates begin having their way with his missus and he begins to chuckle, they wheel around and remind him not to step out of the circle.
They begin off loading his belongings and he chortles thru a clenched hand, they again remind him not to exit the circle.
While they are tying up his kids to sell into slavery, he begins laughing uncontrolably.
The Pirate captain, "Old white hull" steps over and lears at blue hull saying, "TELL ME WHY YE"S A-LAUGHIN" OR I'S'LL GUT YE RIGHT NOW BOY!!!!"
Blue hull boy ponders this and says: "while you werent looking I stepped out of the circle Three times!!
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Mark Prouty
- Admiral
- Posts: 1723
- Joined: Mon Jan 19, 2004 8:52 am
- Location: Madison, WI Former MacGregor 26X Owner
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kmclemore
- Site Admin
- Posts: 6256
- Joined: Sun Feb 08, 2004 9:24 am
- Sailboat: MacGregor 26X
- Location: Ambler, PA -- MACX2018A898 w/ Suzuki DF60AV -- 78 BW Harpoon 4.6 -- 2018 Tahoe 550TF w/ 150 Merc
Republicans demonstrate that they're not about to be out-gunned on the missle race (also note the blue shirt)....
[kinda gives "Click on the image to view it at its original size" a whole new meaning, doesn't it!?]
(And hey, why'd you think they don't call him 'Richard'?... and did you ever notice he's always smiling?
)
[kinda gives "Click on the image to view it at its original size" a whole new meaning, doesn't it!?]
(And hey, why'd you think they don't call him 'Richard'?... and did you ever notice he's always smiling?
)